I don’t know folks. I’m having a difficult time. Not because my mind is brimming with too many thoughts and I don’t know where to start, but because I simply do…. not… know…. where… to… start except these three words: horrible, awkward and creepy.
I was a fan of the book so I knew what to expect. As I said in a previous post, I have been waiting for this to hit theaters for many reasons. At the end of the day the brooding characters, awkward dialogue and bad make-up and weaves make for a good time, and I look forward to it. I was anxious to see how director Bill Condon translated the book — which tackled more mature themes than the previous three — to film. In my mind I thought it would be a good chance for the franchise to grow up and put a good movie together, finally.
I was wrong.
The trailer is the best and only part anyone should watch. Save yourself the 1hr and 39m. Or, go read the book again and save yourself the heartache of seeing a book you enjoyed, skewered.
I don’t know, maybe I’m wrong. Maybe young adults will like seeing the heroine get the boy, finally, and have a dream outdoor wedding no one could afford. Or maybe young girls will think twice about getting pregnant so soon in life after seeing the hard choice Bella has to go through. Or hey, Maybe Rio will see a rise in tourism thanks to the beautiful Isle Esmee. All I know is this.
What was good – short (under 2 hours at 1h 42m), Bella’s wedding shoes (gorgeous), the climactic moment when her heartbeat stops and she wakes with red eyes (admittedly a little cool) and the end (when it was over and I was able to get out of my seat and shake my head wondering just what in the hell I sat through).
The soundtrack is good, featuring artists such as Joy Formidable. Their song “Whirring” is a fave of mine. But in a nutshell, it was horrible. Nothing comedic about this movie as in the others where come on, let’s face it, a love triangle with a vampire, werewolf and human is nothing but, and I was disappointed. Horribly disappointed and I want my money back.